just a quick update, i know i do these infrequently and whatnot but i’m trying to keep this semi-monthly as to make sure y’all know i’m still workin hard.
it turns out i can only really work on sketches and backgrounds at work, as my laptop lacks tilt-control and other similar amenities. that’s kinda a bummer, but i’m still lucky enough to even have the ability to work on my comic at my job to begin with so i can’t really complain.
but the real downer is my tremors are back. basically i use to have this mild tremor in both my hands that they think is a side effect to being prescribed a higher dosage of specific medications at a young age. i’ve always had a high tolerance to medications and a low tolerance to their side effects so it somewhat makes sense to me (kinda the worst of both worlds tho ngl). it comes and goes, the best way i can describe it is that it kinda looks like the sort of shaking that happens from either adrenaline or tensing your muscles for a long time (which weirdly isn’t whats happening), it’s jittery and not that visible on its own . it happens at random and it’s not something i can really control; thankfully it doesn’t hurt or anything and its not nearly as bad as it use to be, but my lineart noticeably suffers because of it. it’s one of the reasons i have a tendency to use hard pen pressure (while wearing down my pen nibs twice as fast).
it’s not a big deal, i don’t want anyone to pity me because it sounds a lot worse than it is. it’s just a lil disappointing cuz i thought it had finally stopped for good the last time it came and went. i can manage it decently while on my desktop, but both my traditional and laptop work has suffered. i keep destroying my laptop’s pen nib by accidentally sharpening it to a point with the amount of pressure i have to place on the pen in order to keep my hand steady. sharpening the pen messes with the input, so halfway through drawing a line it’ll just decide it no longer wants to draw. i also end up pressing my screen down to the point it becomes flat, even though i try to keep it up and an angle. at some point i’m leaning over the screen completely like a gargoyle and get back pain. :^B
i’m just irritated by it is all, i’m mostly healthy so i’m not really worried about it; i’ve had it checked out and doctors say it’ll eventually go away with time, but waiting for it to go away for 7 years can get kinda annoying. sometimes i wonder what would’ve happened if i never had to deal with this, but my guess is i would’ve been worse off. so i might as well just deal with it instead of getting upset that it could’ve been different. who knows, maybe i’m making a big deal outta nothing, maybe my mediterranean ass is just cold- :^[
i’m still pushing really hard to get this comic done though, not many changes are being made at this stage so it’s mostly focused for now. sometimes i worry that i’m taking too long, or that the pacing of the entire thing is gonna take too much time; am i going nowhere with this and just wasting my precious time on something i’ll never finish to what i want it to be? sometimes i worry that the art itself isn’t good enough or too far removed from the original games style to be appealing. but i know (at least for the art) that i’ve got something really different going on, and that’s ok. for the rest of it tho i’m just gonna ignore that for now and keep pushing lol. its whatever, i have a genetic tendency to have a melancholic disposition and get existential about things that don’t need to be that way, but that’s a story for another day. :^P
i also sometimes wonder if the approach i had to the older version of the comic would be beneficial. i know it’s not good to rush things, and to be honest the older comic is ugly as hell, but it can be tempting to want that efficiency over polish. i don’t think i have it in me to follow through with that approach anymore though, i want it to be good too much to disregard the comic’s quality. like i said, i’m just gonna ignore it and push on.
sorry for the long up date, but overall i’m still working on the comic every day and its still moving along despite one or two minor issues. i hope to get iSSUE 2 out by the end of January 2025, which is only about 40ish days at least . i know it sounds like a lot, but however soon i can get it done, i’ll get it done. :^)
